Can I Marry Again if I've Been Born Again?

 by Chuck Snyder
 co-chaplain for the Seattle Mariners

 

Dear Chuck,
I'm a 43-year-old woman who divorced my husband two years ago. The reason I left the 20-year marriage was that I was miserable and so was he. When we married we were both drug addicts and alcoholics ... we were both high when the actual ceremony took place.  As a result, I have never thought that God blessed our union. Along with living a drug-filled life, I committed adultery several times. At the time of the divorce, I was having an affair.

A year ago I fell to my knees and acknowledged Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I repented and was baptized and am trying to live my life like Jesus.

I have met a Christian man, we have been dating for almost a year and we have talked of getting married. I am quite concerned about getting married again. But I am a completely different person than when I married the first time. My question is this: In the eyes of the Lord, is it OK to remarry, now that I have been born again? 

Thank you and may God bless your ministry.

Chuck's Response
Thanks for the note concerning your new life in Christ. God and His angels are still celebrating ... and I am very excited for you. You'll never regret putting yourself in the hands of a loving God. I have good news for you. Since you have asked God's forgiveness for your sins with a broken heart, here is what He does with them. He forgets them! Here are some scriptures that talk about this.

"He has removed our sins as far away from us as the east is from the west," Psalms 103:12 (Living). North and south meet at some point. If you go north for awhile, eventually you will begin to go south because of our round earth. However, have you ever stopped to think about the fact that East and West are different? If you go east you'll always be going east. Or if you go west, you'll always be going west. The two will never meet.

"Repent ye, therefore, and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, when the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the Lord," Acts 3:19 (KJV). " ... and blotted out the charges proved against you, the list of his commandments which you had not obeyed. He took this list of sins and destroyed it by nailing it to Christ's cross," Colossians 2:14 (Living). "For God was in Christ, restoring the world to himself, no longer counting men's sins against them but blotting them out. This is the wonderful message he has given us to tell others." 2 Corinthians 5:19 (Living)

You're probably too young to remember blotters, but we used to use pen and ink in school. We would blot the ink to keep it from smearing, because it dried slowly. However, if you blotted it too quickly, you took all the ink away. God's "blotter" erased all of our sins.

"I will never again remember their sins and lawless deeds when sins have once been forever forgiven and forgotten, there is no need to offer more sacrifices to get rid of them," Hebrews 10:17-18 (Living). "And I will be merciful to them in their wrongdoing, and I will remember their sins no more," Hebrews 8:12 (Living). I take God at His Word when the Bible says He will never remember our sins anymore. They are forever out of His memory. What a gift that is.

"It was good for me to go through all of this bitterness. You have delivered me from death, and have put all of my sins behind Your back," Isaiah 38:17. I love the picture of God reaching around and putting my sins behind His back where He can't get at them. There are many other scriptures that imply that our sins have been covered by Christ's blood and thrown in the deepest sea. God forgives our mistakes, so we can forgive others for their mistakes as well, and help them go on. So if the God of the universe has forgiven and forgotten ... you don't have to still carry the burden. You are now as pure as the purest snow in God's eyes, so put the past behind you and move on.

I'm glad God has brought a Christian man into your life. Just focus on the future, since God has forgiven your past. Because of God's forgiveness, you are free to marry again.

Chuck Snyder

 

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Contact Chuck: chuck@chucksnyder.org
Updated 05/24/2005