Husband's Emphasis on Sex

 by Chuck Snyder
 co-chaplain for the Seattle Mariners

 

Dear Chuck,
It seems like all my husband thinks about is sex. Is he some sort of pervert or is he normal?

Chuck's Response
Gary Smalley got we men into trouble with one of his books where he said that men think about sex every 50 seconds. Now thatís ridiculous. I have no idea where he got that figure. I know itís wrong from my own personal experience. Iíve gone for a minute and a half without thinking about sex, so heís way off base on this. Barb and I were doing one of our marriage seminars one time, and we didn't have much time left. Barb wanted to finish a thought so she said "In a minute, Chuck will tell you everything he knows about sex." The audience of course broke up. After things were back to order I corrected Barb. I said "it will take me at least TWO minutes to tell them everything I know about sex." This will come as a shock to you, but the sexual relationship a man has with his wife is the most fun thing he does, and is his greatest need. GREATEST need! He's not some kind of animal. God gave him this intense desire and interest to make sure the human race survives, and also to give a married couple the highest ecstasy this life can offer. 

After things were back to order I corrected Barb. I said "it will take me at least TWO minutes to tell them everything I know about sex." This will come as a shock to you, but the sexual relationship a man has with his wife is the most fun thing he does, and is his greatest need. GREATEST need! He's not some kind of animal. God gave him this intense desire and interest to make sure the human race survives, and also to give a married couple the highest ecstasy this life can offer. 

Sex was GOD'S idea. And He thought long and hard about whether to give Adam or Eve the primary responsibility for this part of marriage. He finally chose Adam because in His foreknowledge He knew that if He trusted Eve with this important work, she never would have thought about it! The Bible would only have one book in it, because the history of mankind would have been written about ABRAHAM, ISSAC, JACcccob, and poof. The end of the human race would have come quickly, because Eve had so many other things to think about. On the other hand Adam was focused and one-dimensional and expressed his eagerness to take care of this critical part of God's plan for mankind, and God in his foreknowledge knew he would do a good job. Therefore ladies, when your husband wants to go to bed a little early once in awhile, please know that this is NOT for himself. It's for the DESTINY of MANKIND the PRESERVATION of the RACE!! What a noble and soul-stirring burden for man to carry. Your husband is no doubt interested in being in strict obedience to his God as he carries out God's mandate to preserve the human race from going down the drain because of the woman being so busy. 

Are you impressed yet? I didnít think so. Just take my word for it. Your husband is absolutely normal. The problem comes within the framework of a monogamous marriage where the man is constantly thinking about physical sex. On the other hand, most women rarely think about physical sex, except as the frosting on the cake of a loving, caring marriage relationship. While the first thoughts of a man are about sex, the first thoughts of a woman are usually about the relationship, and how she is being treated in other areas of her marriage. Someone has said men make love to FEEL good and women make love WHEN they feel good. That means the whole relationship has to be going well before the woman feels like going to bed with her husband. So ladiesÖ.he is not some sort of BEAST! He is just trying to keep the human race from going down the drain. A very noble and inspiring God-given job. I KNOW you women are impressed now that I have explained it. Arenít you?

Chuck Snyder
 

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Contact Chuck: chuck@chucksnyder.org
Updated 05/24/2005